|
| I'm not the submissive little creature you first laid hands on, Im not the broken little girl that you made weak,
im not your starving little princess or your wounded little bird and to me true love no longer means defeat.
I have salvaged what is left of this exsistance,
no longer frail and lost or hiding in my shame,
and I've finally lost the syndrom that you gave,
me when you dropped your faults and handed me the blame....
and sadly I would gladly smile and take it..clutch it to my chest and somehow make it mine.
The day you promised me the sky is long forgotten,
but if you were keeper of the stars they would'nt shine.
you posion everything around you with your malice
and break countless hearts to find one for your own
I'ts a shame you couldnt be blessed with compassion
but like me your scared to wind up all alone. | | |
| To love or not to love I guess is really not the question, for when you fall in love it’s really more like an obsession.
It hurts you deeper than you every really know your hurting, and even when your used to it, it still can get unnerving.
You wonder if your moving forward or slowly moving back.
You become overly aware of all the things that you may lack.
Beyond what you are feeling is what you have to know,
although they seem to love you and they say they will never let you go sometimes you have to be the one to breathe and say goodbye.
It might even show their hurting if they take the time to cry.
Can you wipe the tears they cry away and continue on your journey?
Or will you stay and watch them weep happy now that they are finally hurting.
That’s the Question you have to answer not “to love or not to love"?
Can’t you get over something that you’re really not above?
Can you survive through all this pain and not come out in pieces;
does the person that’s hurting you even care enough to see it?
Will you be whole in the end and able to move on?
I thought that I could do that but I’m really not that strong. | | |
| How does your happily ever after begin?
Does it start with the saddest goodbye?
does it start with the onset of pain? Does it appear after your eyes are finally dry.
After you have cried your final tear do you deserve happiness then? After you heart is done breaking can it ever be whole again.
Why does everyone go around with their optimistic smiles,
everyone of them has felt the pain and held it for a while.
Why do we still believe in love when it is snatched away from us every time.
Songs and poems that gives us hope...
we are sucked in by every line,
But love is nothing but a story,
a fairy tale, a nursery rhyme....
how does your happily ever after begin?
Does it start with the saddest goodbye? | | |
| I cant tell you how many times I sat and watched her...her with her beautiful smile...her big brown eyes...and hair perfect and soft...
but I was not envious of that...much ...
I was ashamed that anyone would be...
beneath the ample chest beat a heart like no other...
it saddened me how few would ever get to know that...
sometimes you would look at her and understand how her beauty was able to blind...
at others you would be stand laughing on the sidelines while the blind underestimated her again and again...
listen to her speak when it moves her to open her mouth...
your not just hearing a pretty voice...
if your lucky your listening to words more powerful than most dare speak...
watch her when shes angry...
you'll find passion...
bask in the smile sends to cheer you up...
for it is the sun...
you just dont know it yet...
there is so much more to explain...
she goes far deeper than any white rabbit's hole...
luck and good fortune do not even express stumbling onto a person such as this...
for if you stand where i stand you are truly blessed...as I understand it I have found a true friend...
or have I simply been blinded aswell...? | | |
| frustrated with myself.....
I thought i could do better....
better than just a cheap imatation of whats better than me...whats the best
why do I even bother?
why do I surround myself with beauty...so i can look more closely at myself and see each and every disfigurement...imperfection....blemish...line....scar
why does looking at myself through that internal mirror in my mind feel like slow self mutalation from the inside out
the pain is all caused by me...so its my fault that I hurt....and yet everyone around me causes me pain
just by being themselves....
being perfect because they are flawed....
but their flaws are beautiful and always will be to me...
and my flaws are what shames the world | | |
|
